Prospective voters ready for a fresh perspective in politics at the state level got that and much more in Anna last Saturday.
There was plenty of great music, tasty BBQ and even free beer at John Hardin's Shaman Spring Ranch just outside of Anna, Texas Saturday afternoon, but the crowd was there to listen to independent gubernatorial candidate Kinky Friedman speak and the witty newcomer to the political arena didn’t let them down. Hardin proved to be the perfect host for this event, too, opening the event with a poem he wrote for the occasion, sitting in on the spoons with talented singer/guitarist Ian Dickson and then breaking into an impromptu rain dance in front of the crowd when a brief shower interrupted the proceedings.
Dickson also voiced what every man in the audience was thinking when he admitted, “Man, if I’d invited all you guys to a party in my front yard…my wife would have killed me.”
Of course, Friedman delivered most of the best lines this day, but the independent gubernatorial candidate’s opening remarks showed a more serious side of his campaign. This will be a better place to live and raise our children, Friedman observed, if we can get prayer back in the schools and professional politicians out of government.
“May the God of your choice bless you,” the candidate for governor remarked and later he offered advice on how to limit the influence of big business lobbyists.
“Never re-elect anybody,” Friedman told the crowd.
He said politicians aren’t at the top of the list of people that could effectively deal with the pressing issues, anyway.
“I’d rather have beauticians making those decisions any day,” Kinky said as a chuckle ran through the audience in Anna. “If you want integrity and creativity in government, how about musicians? We won’t get much done in the morning, but we work late.”
The humor in a Kinky Friedman speech is as obvious as the major problems plaguing the electoral process. Candidates are failing to inspire voters over the real issues of the day. The result is a government elected by a fraction of the eligible voters.
“They spent $100 million on the last governor’s race and managed to drive 71% of us away from the polls,” Friedman pointed out.
Texans are paying a larger percentage of their paycheck for energy costs, both to put gas in the car and to cool and heat their homes. Friedman says Texas now ranks 50th in education. When he asked if maybe all the fuss over gay marriage has been to take the focus off critical problems such as energy and education that no one seems to have the courage to tackle, the crowd in North Texas last Saturday seemed willing to contemplate the possibility.
“We’ve been arguing about gay marriage issues for four years…aren’t we all better off?” Friedman asked cynically. “They have every right to be as miserable as the rest of us.”
Meanwhile, more prominent issues are not being addressed. In addition to rising energy costs, escalating property taxes and a faltering confidence in the state’s willingness to shoulder its historical share of the cost of public education, questions are surfacing about how we treat professionals that are the backbone of society.
“Veterans, cops, firefighters, teachers…if we are not going to pay people like that a fair salary, what kind of country is it anyway?” Friedman asked.
To properly finance public education in the state, a permanent revenue stream must be created and Friedman sees legalized gambling in areas where local governments approve as a viable option. Instead of Texas money contributing to the economies of Nevada, Louisiana, Oklahoma, New Mexico and now Mississippi, why not allow Padre Island and Corpus Christi to compete?
“Folks, we invented Texas hold ‘em and we can’t even play it here,” the independent candidate stated.
Friedman believes that $6-$8 billion annually could be hardwired directly from the state’s share of gaming revenue into public education. The way the lottery works, he says, makes it the answer to the joke, “What has six balls and screws Texas?”
While people like Willie Nelson, Lance Armstrong and now Jimmy Buffet are asking how they can help support Friedman’s run for governor, there are still technicalities to iron out. For instance, Buffett wants Port Aransas. When the mayor of Port Aransas offered to give the singer a key to the city, Friedman had to point out that Buffett has his heart set on the actual city.
Another campaign snag came up when a TV camera caught “Kinky McFriedman” drinking a Guinness at a Saint Patrick’s Day Parade in a dry county.
“Look, somebody gave me a Guinness, the drink that kept the Irish from taking over the world,” Friedman fessed up.
He offered an allusion to former President Bill Clinton’s famous “I didn’t inhale” line.
“I admit I did drink the Guinness,” Friedman said, “but I did not swallow.”
The independent candidate’s speech took a philosophical turn when Friedman closed by paraphrasing one of John Kennedy’s most memorable statements.
“Ask not if you are proud of Texas,” Friedman told the audience in Anna, Texas. “Ask if you made Texas proud of you.”
In November’s General Election, Texas voters will decide if Kinky Friedman gets to ask the state legislature to take that test.
